"Thanks to you Shari, I was still able to remain calm throughout and look back and feel confident".

Friday 23/4/21 at 10:07pm, our son Xavier decided to join us earth side weighing in at 4.42kg and 55cm Long at 40+5 weeks

What a journey it was to get him here, there were so many twists and turns that we weren’t prepared for but thanks to Shari and the knowledge we gained from your course, we were able to still have a positive experience and make decisions that were right for us.

It all started on Thursday 22/4 – It was a very normal day for me which included my morning walk with my furbabies, daily household chores, a hypno track and nap in the afternoon and then cook dinner whilst listening to my affirmations. We went to bed around 7pm and I started having some braxton hicks which was normal for me after dinner. By 8pm I started to notice they were quite regular and had mild period like cramp feeling to them. I was trying to watch my programme while my husband slept as he was still working at the time but then I started to realise they were happening more frequently and were slowly intensifying. I didn’t think too much of it as I didn’t have any other signs so just kept calm rubbing my belly talking to my son and watching TV. I got up around 9pm and sat on the ball doing some rotations whilst still trying to watch my show, it was a really good episode, I was determined to see what happened! By 10pm I started to treat them as true surges and decided to move to the shower with some fairy lights listening to the “prompts for birthing” track so I could create a positive calming atmosphere, start to relax, get in the zone and focus on my breathing. By midnight I finally woke my husband to pack the car and start getting ready to head to the hospital as my surges were becoming more frequent and intensifying and I had been instructed by the hospital to present there once I thought i was in labour due to a condition I have. While my husband packed the car I slowly got myself ready and decided to try out the TENS machine which worked really well. I napped in the car on the way to the hospital listening to affirmations and using the TENS machine on a low setting, it was extremely relaxing. We arrived at the hospital just after 1.30am.

I have a very mild clotting issue where I take a little longer than normal to clot than the “average person" which the hospital was aware of. Throughout my whole pregnancy I had regular check ups and tests to make sure all my levels were good and there was never any concern regarding it. Upon arrival they informed us the haematology department had a plan in place regarding my condition and they needed to give me some medication to ensure I don’t bleed out which I agreed to but was not aware of before hand. I needed a cannula placed in my hand for them to administer it which I thought was strange as I was under the impression it was just going to be a simple injection. They also asked to do a VE which I agreed to but I didn’t want to know how far along I was. Throughout all this and waiting for a birth suite I stayed in my relaxed state with my headphones in using the TENS machine while my husband talked to all the doctors and midwives and relayed anything important to me. Once we finally got to a birth suite around 230am, the simple medication I thought was needed turned into a 3 bag transfusion with constant monitoring which threw me off a bit, but I accepted that it was in the best interest for myself and baby and got myself comfortable with my headphones and hypno tracks while my husband set up fairy lights, LED candles and some affirmation posters all around the room for me. I stayed in a very relaxed state drifting in and out, breathing through my surges and using the TENS machine when I remembered to. Time flew by, i didn’t realise the whole process had taken over 2 hours by the time they were finished. About 430/5am I was Finally free of all the monitors and I.V lines. I was unable to use the bath unfortunately which again was something I was not aware of but was happy to be able to use the shower. My husband had set up the bathroom with lights, affirmations and a speaker where I switched it up and put on a playlist I had created with acoustic songs so I could relax, sway and sing to. Time was just disappearing as I was in a deep state of relaxation, breathing through my surges, enjoying the hot water, music and visualising meeting my son. it was about 9am by this stage and the midwife’s wanted to do another VE which I agreed to. I had written in my preferences that I didn’t want to know how far along I was however I was too nosey and curious and wanted to know at this stage as we were at the 12hour mark and I was still feeling really good. I was 8cm, which I felt really good about and thought we were progressing very nicely. I asked for the Gas to be set up in the bathroom as I could feel my surges intensifying and wanted it there as an option to help with my breathing. I continued in the shower for the next few hours, listening to music, changing positions regularly and then started to use the gas which was a great help. The midwives wanted to do another VE at 1pm which I was fine with as I felt we had made some more progress. To my disappointment though I was still at 8cm which is where I can definitely see, looking back now, changed my relaxed positive state of mind at the time. After much discussion and some persuasion from the midwives, I decided to pop my waters to hopefully encourage progression. Instantly my surges intensified and I could not stomach the gas anymore as it made me sick. I was never informed either that once my waters were broken that they wanted to continuously monitor me which threw me right off. Thankfully I was still able to continue in the shower, as this was the most comfortable and enjoyable environment for me. By 2pm I was starting to struggle with keeping in my zone and a positive head space as the midwife’s kept wanting to adjust the monitors because the water from the shower and my movements were interfering with them. Because of this I decided to move out to the room to try some different positions over the bed and hopefully find my relaxed state again. The midwives wanted to do another VE at 4pm which I declined as my surges started to move to my back and I was not comfortable lying down. My husband began rubbing my back, some acupressure points and holding my hips during my surges to create more space as I could feel him starting to move down into my butt. I agreed to one more VE after 6pm as I was feeling pressure and the need to poop but they were concerned that I was not yet fully dilated and wanted to make sure. I was still only 9cm so they advised me to refrain from pushing and wanted to start me on the syntocinon drip which I declined. The next midwife that came on shift at 7pm amazingly had some experience in hypno birthing and was a God send at this stage as. She helped me to concentrate on my breathing again. While my husband did light touch during my surges she would apply pressure to my back and twist my hips to help create space as baby had definitely turned and gone full posterior. She helped with different positions to try encourage him to turn as well as trying to provide some relief throughout my surges. By 9pm I could tell that there hadn’t been much movement as the pressure during my surges were still in my butt. The midwife also determined his head hadn’t moved as she could feel him on my tail bone. I was becoming quite exhausted at this stage and baby was starting to become distressed. Because I was unable to have any kind of pain relief due to my condition I was left with only 2 options. Try the syntocinon drip and see if that helps with progression or to opt for a c-section. After discussing the pros and cons with my husband I decided to go with the c-section. While we waited for the theatre to be available it allowed me a little more time to try some last minute positions and nipple stimulation to see if I could progress on my own but my boy was quite cosy in there it seemed. The team in the operating room were so amazing. They asked if I would like to put on my own music which we said yes to, that created a very lovely and positive atmosphere for us. The nurses offered to take photos of when he was first entering the world for us also which was so special and respected all our wishes on our birth preference, such as delayed cord clamping, my husband cutting the cord and skin to skin while they stitched me up. Hearing that first cry when he entered the world and seeing him for the first time over the drapes made every twist and turn completely worth it. They informed us that he was indeed quite “wedged" in an awkward position in my pelvis and that I more than likely would have still ended up needing a c-section even if we had decided to try and continue on a bit longer. That made me feel confident in my decision as I couldn’t help but wonder if I had made the right call before hand.

Even though our journey took so many different paths and we encountered some unforeseen obstacles along the way,

and positive with the decisions we made. I believe all the techniques and knowledge we learnt helped me so much not only during labour but in the weeks leading up as well. We are so in love with our son and still in awe that he’s finally here .

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